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Published on March 13, 2007 By Sugar High Elf In Dating
For anyone keeping up with my life, you might remember my attempt at Internet dating. You might also remember that I actually met someone that I have enjoyed talking to. You might also be aware that I made a wish list to Cupid, and I am happy to report that, thus far, Zach (that's his name) meets every single one of my requirements. Recap:

1. I want a man.
He has a real job. He is a teacher. He seems mature, honest... just what I asked for.
2. I want a man with a sense of humor.
I have enjoyed laughing for hours on the phone. He laughs at my jokes and goofy stories, and then tells me funny stories of his own.
3. I want a geek. I want someone who can appreciate the qualities of Star Trek TNG over Voyager. Someone who can quote one of the following: Star Wars (any episode), Lord of the Rings (if TT is his favorite, it will be love), or Harry Potter. He gets bonus points if he can quote from both books and movies.
He can't quote from Harry Potter, but that is all he is missing. Two Towers is his favorite movie! Can you believe it? He knows his Star Trek better than I! I still know LotR better, which makes me think we're even.
4. I want a man who is open-minded.
I've heard no racist remarks yet. We share similar religious and political beliefs. I didn't know there were other Southern Baptist Democrats out there!
5. I want a man who likes dogs.
He has a dog, and her name is Izzy.
6. I want a man who likes to read.
He doesn't have much time to read these days, but he was an English minor. And, when he has time, he likes to read.
7. I want a man who can appreciate me.
Can't be sure of this one yet, but he does seem to enjoy talking to me, and he appreciates the coolness of my getting into grad. school.
8. I want a man who has passion for life.
He hikes, and wants to learn to canoe or kayak. Good enough for me!
9. I want a man with morals, with scruples, and with a conscience.
So far, so good.
10. I want a man with whom I am compatible.
Again, so far, we are a match.

Things have been tough lately, we've both been ridiculously busy. Despite that, he still found time to ask me out!

I'm really excited about this. There is the small problem that I may be moving to Tennessee this summer... but maybe not. I don't know. I'm just going to take one thing at a time and see what happens.

Comments
on Mar 13, 2007
sounds like a great beginning - I hope it all works out for you.
on Mar 13, 2007
Congrats!

Seriously, I hope it all works out for you. I met my (amazing!) girlfriend online, on okcupid.com in fact, and we've been together for almost 8 months. Funny thing is, we weren't really looking. We'd both been recovering from pretty bad relationships, and were cautious with even casual friendships, but...we both admitted that there was something.

It's been amazing. In fact, so much so, we gave each other promise rings.

~L
on Mar 14, 2007
I believe meeting people online is now as valid a form of meeting someone as anything else. In some cases, I think it is better because the physical doesn't get in the way. Being online gives people a chance to get to know each other's intellect first, which is a lovely change.

Regardless of what you decide to do, I wish you all the best.
on Mar 14, 2007

Have you seen him yet?

I think its great you all are hitting it off....but, what does he look like?  It may not be the MOST important thing, but it is important.  Right?  Or is that just me?

I remember when people were ashamed to admit meeting someone on line...now its like saying you met someone at the mall.

I'm happy for you.  Hope it works out.

on Mar 14, 2007

Neil Clark Warren would be proud!

best of luck!

on Mar 14, 2007
Tova, it's not just you. Looks are important. And while I agree with Dynamaso that it's nice to actually get to know someone without the physical interfering, I checked out his pictures just as much as his profile. Lucky for me, I've seen a lot of pictures of him. And not just the pictures you put on your dating profile, I've seen his Facebook and his MySpace pictures. If he looks anything like his pictures, then I'll be fine because I think he's pretty cute.

Some kids in one of my classes were making fun of online dating, yet they all knew someone who was either dating, engaged to or married to someone they met online. I think the stigma of online dating is leaving slowly. There are still some people who think, "Only losers online date. They do that because they can't find anyone to date them in real life." I told my class that sometimes, it is a matter of being around eligible people. I'm not in a situation where I meet a lot of new guys who are as old or older than I am.

We'll see how the first date goes.
on Mar 14, 2007
We'll see how the first date goes


If you are anything in real life like on Joeuser...he'll probably propose!hahaha

I'm glad he's not some sweaty bald 50 year old stringing you along.

If I were dating....I would def be looking on line. I don't care what anyone says...after all isn't finding someone you love worth looking anywhere?

I think so.

on Mar 14, 2007
I think it's great that you found someone compatible who seems to be perfect for you!

It's good that you also checked him out too!

Just promise me that on your first face to face date you meet in a very public place in the day time or daylight! Just so that what sounds too good to be true really proves to be true and your instincts is OK with your heart! I know, I know, I just had to be mommy for a min there! I am happy for you and wish you the best of luck with this relationship!
on Mar 14, 2007
I don't find anything wrong with meeting people on-line, and it looks like you met someone good. Ten for ten. That's pretty damn good. Plus you seem like a smart young woman who knows what she wants and doesn't want so who cares how you met him. Maybe someday you can tell your grandkids how you met.

Just continue to move at the pace you're comfortable at. Good luck with the first date and I hope everything works out for you.
on Mar 14, 2007
f you are anything in real life like on Joeuser...he'll probably propose!hahaha



Since Two Towers is his favorite of the LotR movies, I might just say yes.

Just promise me that on your first face to face date you meet in a very public place in the day time or daylight!


I promise... no fingers crossed or anything. I was thinking a restaraunt and then if things went well, bowling. I'll probably have a few friends shadowing us as well... just to be on the safe side.


Here are a few of the things the kids in my class thought about online dating:

"You can't trust what people put online. They make themselves look better."
My response? I don't trust what people look like in bars either. Do you think any of those people always look that good? No way. The next morning when the push-up bra is off, things change. I think you run this risk anyway. It takes a long time before I'll let a guy see me without my makeup on.

"I wonder if online dating is responsible for the increase in divorce rates."
Possible. People do expect that people 'matched' to them will be perfect for them, and break things off when the other person turns out not to be perfect, make them happier, or a 'soul mate'. However, I blame that more on mentality than on online dating.

"If it hasn't increased divorce rates, it's probably increased murder rates."
Yeah, because everyone online is a creepy murderer. I tried to explain that online dating was safer than randomly meeting people. You get to know them before you meet... e-mail, talk on the phone, etc. Then, of course, if you are smart, you meet in public, have friends nearby, police on speed dial. I don't think online predators are limited to chat rooms for teens, but I don't think online dating is worse than blind dates or picking people up at parties/bars.
on Mar 14, 2007
I'm thinking of venturing into online dating myself. I was one of those people who used to be against it. Now, I'd like to give it a shot. It's something I haven't tried.

Good luck! It's awesome you found someone!
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